I hear a lot of woman talking about what they want a future significant other to do for them.
- I want a woman who will shower me in flowers.
- I want a woman who will take me out on the town.
- I want a woman who will kiss me passionately.
And every time I hear it, I think…Would you do that?
- Would you shower them in flowers?
- Would you take them out on the town?
- Would you kiss them passionately?
Most of them probably would. But, wouldn’t it be better to focus on what you would do for them? I try to think of the things that I will do for my future girlfriend. Not what I want them to do for me. To me that is taking an active participation in the relationship, not sitting back and waiting for things to happen. I can’t control how someone is going to love me but I can control how I will love someone. I wouldn’t want them questioning if I love them or not and am going to do everything I can imagine to make sure they never do. Yes, I want to shower my girlfriend/wife in flowers. I want to take them out on the town for a romantic dinner and a walk on the beach. I want to kiss them passionately that they feel it in their toes. I want to walk up behind them and wrap my arms around them just to show them that I wanted to feel them close and to know I was thinking of them at that exact moment.
If I have these ideals of what I want them to do, I may be setting myself up for disappointment. People can’t read minds so how are they going to know that you want these things. You tell them? Doesn’t that then take away the spark of it. That is also writing a script for the relationship, what fun is there in that? There has to be spontaneity in a relationship. That is how you make those special moments that will last a lifetime. When you two are old and grey and rocking in your chairs on the porch, those are the moments that you will look back on remember fondly. Not the moments that you scripted out in your mind before they happened.
Sure we all these little fantasies in our minds of how we want our wedding day to look. What we want the first kiss to be like. How we fall asleep next to the love of our life every night. I am not saying don’t think about these things. Just give equal time to what you are going to do for the love of your life. Plan out now what you will do for the love of your life before you meet them, not set up a round of hoops they have to jump through from the get go.
So, what is the one thing that you want to do for the love of your life? Be it you already have them or haven’t found them yet, what are you going to do for them to show them you love them?